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An original, person-specific joke makes you stand out among vague come-ons.

According to Ok Cupid, “Saying ‘Hey’ in a first message is almost equivalent to saying nothing — this greeting has an 84% chance of being completely ignored.” That first exchange sets the tone for the rest of the relationship, so you should go beyond one-word openers and say something to give your date a laugh.

Lindsay Lohan: I would define my personality as, uh, Lindsay Lohan: creative. Lindsay Lohan: I'm a workaholic, a shopaholic, and Lindsay Lohan: according to the state of Lindsay Lohan: California, an alcoholic, as well as a Lindsay Lohan: threat to all security guards if they Lindsay Lohan: work at hotels.

And to put all those Lindsay Lohan: rumors to rest, I am not broke.

A solid joke can help you get your conversation off on the right foot — or at least up your odds of getting a response. We’ve collected 14 examples of funny online dating messages that tickle the funny bone and make a good impression.

pretty good, but you could send that message to pretty much anyone. Getting personal and showing you’ve actually read someone’s profile is a much more compelling way to elicit a response.

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Your online photos and profile are your personal advertisement in cyberspace; they need to be amazing.

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App Annie only identified two major apps targeting lesbians: Les Park, which is strongest in China, and HER, which has consistently ranked at around the 100th most popular free app in the U. Apple App store since July, on some days topping Grindr's downloads.

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The index of the advice columns is here, to give you a sense of the kind of engaged, professional and in-depth answers it provides.

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Downloadable or Web-based instant messaging programs offer another free way to get one-on-one with someone special. As she tried to relax on the table, he stood at her head and pulled her long hair off to one side of her face, then began lightly stroking her from the neck to the small of her back.

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Not many things in life are as rewarding, exciting as meeting the love of your life, experiencing the joy of a loving relationship with a special someone.

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Words you should try to use include “yoga”, “surfing”, “Radiohead”, “abs”, and “whom”.

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